Satnav lady...

A satnav was something I never thought I’d buy. I’d always relied on my innate sense of direction, which meant, of course, that I regularly got lost. The Romahome isn’t much bigger than a regular car, but it’s not as ‘nippy’, and the sightlines are poor. It’s not always easy to stop and check the map, especially in town. So I went to Halfords, took the salesman’s advice and bought a Garmain satnav. For an extra tenner, I got the version pre-loaded with maps of Europe as well as GB. You never know.

Now I’m wondering how I ever managed without it. When I need to get to a photographic location, I tap in a name or a postcode, wait two seconds for the gadget to orientate itself… then set off. The first time I used the satnav, I obeyed every instruction the satnav lady delivered. I was a bit nervous about contradicting her. On the second occasion I disobeyed her every instruction, to see what would happen (this is how most of my relationships end). I half expected her to go into a huff. But no, she just sighed - albeit inaudibly - recalculated, and offered revised instructions.

She’s pretty accurate, though not infallible. In Morecambe she issued four ‘turn left’ instructions in quick succession, which, unsurprisingly, took me in a circle, back to where I’d been two minutes earlier. That’s the effect that Morecambe has on me too.