Alexander Burn...

Drove through Lincolnshire, and over the Humber Bridge. I had notes ready to pay... but it only cost £1.50. I crossed the Severn Bridge a few days ago. It cost £7 and, once across, you're in Wales. Cross the Humber for thirty bob... and you're in Yorkshire. A bargain!

Funeral Director in Tewkesbury, who always recommends cremation rather than burial. Don't know why...