Products for the third age...

A brochure fell out of my copy of the Goole Times yesterday. Not the Innovations catalogue (which bit the dust years ago), but “everyday solutions” from a company called Easylife. It took me a few moments to realise that all the products are aimed at older folk like me… and what a dismal picture the brochure paints! A “copper infused support” eases aches and pains around knees and ankles. A “titanium magnetic bracelet” helps to “reduce neuropathic pain, fatigue and muscle tension” (at least among those in the gullible hypochondriac community).

A walking stick features a “pivoting light”. There’s a device to remove ear wax. A 14-day pill wallet keeps your medications organised. A self-cleaning toilet brush “prevents stubborn residue from sticking to the bristles”. You can refresh your oven, the brochures gushes, with a “shelf make-over” (which just means buying another shelf). And it’s good to know that “urine stains and odours simply spray away” with a product called ‘Urine Destroyer’. Now, where did I put my credit card?

Recently licensed: Pentre Ifan, a neolithic dolmen in Pembrokeshire...