Gwyneth Paltrow has been flogging scented candles on her Goop website. Apparently, they smell like her vagina. I only know this because that’s what’s printed on the label. According to the website, the scent is a blend of "geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with Damask rose and amber seed”, which seems to ask more questions than it answers. I won’t be buying one. Firstly, I can find a better use for £58, which is what the candles cost, and secondly, because they’ve sold out. Insert own joke here; we seem to be living in a land beyond satire…
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